Xtina, Goldfrapp, Golden Filter or Gaga?

Okay, I know this has been all over the blogs and everyone is dissecting it to death, but I find this stuff totally fascinating. I’m one of those suckers that absolutely loves when Cuse & Lindelof create some new, ridiculous little online puzzle for Losties. I also recognize that there are a lot of people that see these kinds of things and immediately scream at their computer before throwing it out the window. Different strokes for different folks.

This one is especially interesting to me because a few online sleuths have tentatively tied it to the new album by *drum roll*…Christina Aguilera. Or Xtina. Whatever it is she’s called these days.

Your initial reaction might be ‘So you’re excited about a Christina Aguilera album?’. My answer is yes. Especially since this new album features production by Sia, Ladytron, Goldfrapp, Santigold and M.I.A. Come on, put everything else aside and the one fact that’s difficult to deny is that Miss Xtina has some considerable pipes. You may not like what she typically allows to brew forth from those pipes, but that’s a separate issue.

In fact, it’s her usual repertoire that’s led to the confusion over whether this really is her or not. Some have speculated this was a viral campaign for Goldfrapp, Lady Gaga, The Knife or even The Golden Filter (all of whom have albums coming out soon). But apparently Goldfrapp have denied the connection, no one is sure Gaga is coming out with something else so quickly after The Fame Monster, and The Golden Filter clearly have their own little campaign going on. The Knife? Maybe. They are doing that Charles Darwin opera.

But everyone keeps coming back to Christina. At first glance, these videos seem a wee bit too dark and artsy-edgy for Xtina, but some internet smarties have put together clues included in the video titles that seem to point to Miss Aguilera.

First, there’s this side by side comparison of Christina and the muddy girl from the video, which seems to indicate they are one and the same (or at least share similar noses). Second, there’s the similarity to artwork by Alix Malka, who is supposedly drawing her album cover. Third, there’s the odd series of #’s that serve as titles for each of the viral clips:

The math goes as follows:
699130082.451322 = (38.17) = (CH.AG) = CH. AG.
9.1.13.669321018 = I. A. M. CH.
9.20.19.13.5.723378 = I.T.S.M.E.C.

Now, math has never been my strong suit, but that last line I’m not too sure about. It adds up to 30, and I suppose they’re just dropping the 0 and using it as 3 (C). There’s also the matter of the decimal points, and that this solution doesn’t apply them consistently in each example. But I’m not an expert on ciphers so maybe I’m being too restrictive.

Or maybe I’m not. MTV says it’s not Christina. Then there’s this website – www.iamamiwhoami.com – which seems to point toward a March 23rd release date. Billboard has confirmed an April release date for Bionic, and other sources say the first single will be out in February.

The website mentions the word Jordgubbstarta, which is a Swedish strawberry cake. That brings us back to The Knife as a possibility, though I’m not sure what strawberry cake might have to do with Darwin. The other snag there is that they released the opera digitally today. So why go through all this to promote a physical release in March? Ahhhh, but then someone pointed out this picture that Christina recently took at one of Pee Wee Herman’s recent LA shows:

She’s wearing a strawberry cake shirt! Seems like a stretch, but some are pointing to this as confirmation. But why Swedish cake if it’s Xtina? Ahhhhhhhh….will this madness ever end? Hopefully someone will figure this out soon, and we can move on to the next trivial distraction.

PS – However this turns out, I’m still dying to hear what Ladytron wrote for her. That collaboration is a trip.

Tags: christina aguilera, goldrapp, iamamiwhoami, lady gaga, the golden filter, the knife